The Donald Grabs a Jab Out of Alcatraz with Gator Run-in

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Sources say the former president was spotted on a boat near the infamous island prison, where he allegedly tried throw something to a massive reptile. Witnesses claim that Trump maybe got a little a bit personal with the beast, leading some whispering. The {entireincident was captured on video, and the footage have rapidly gone trending online.

Hot off the Press: The Donald and the Danger Lizards!

A shocking development is unfolding at Mar-a-Lago as we speak/right now/at this very moment. Sources report that former President T.D. has faced off against a pack of dangerous lizards, said to be mutated by radiation/the result of government experiments/escaped from Area 51.

Eyewitnesses claim to have seen the former leader grappling with the creatures, wielding a silver spoon. The situation is still developing/unfolding/sketchy, and we await official statements from the White House.

Stay tuned for more updates on this utterly bonkers event!

The Donald's Wild Tour of Alcatraz

Get ready for a wild ride, folks! Trump is hitting the rock/island/prison like never before in a tour/experience/adventure they're calling the Gator Gauntlet. Sources say he's planning on showing off/lecturing about/taking control of the island, wearing a MAGA hat the whole time. He's even rumored to be put in a gold-plated bidet during his visit. This ain't your grandma's tour of Alcatraz, folks. Brace yourselves!

Gator Jail? Definitely, Declares the Donald

Folks, more info lemme tell ya somethin'. That mess down in Florida is gettin' worse. They got these crocodiles runnin' wild. And what do they do? Nothing! They just let 'em wander around. But not me, I wouldn't stand for that. We gotta get tough of these reptiles. That's why I say we gotta build a gator jail - Alcatraz for these pesky beasts, folks! That's what makes America great, takin' standin' up to danger.

Trump's Wild Ride: Presidential GATOR Safari!

This ain't your typical campaign rally, folks. The Boss Man himself is hitting the swamps on a wild maniacal rampage. That's right, we're talking about Trumpbattling beastly reptiles. Sources say he's packing his favorite hat and expecting a challenge. Will he make a deal with the biggest gator in the swamp? Only time will tell!

You Won't Believe This! Trump Goes Cage Diving With Gators

Folks, you are seriously gonna believe this! The Donald himself, ex Prez Trump, has decided to go on a wild expedition. He's trading his golf clubs for some serious bravery and is diving into a pen full of vicious alligators! Word on the street that this whole thing was his idea.

What could possibly be more wild? Only time will tell.

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